Category: Happiness

Giving thanks - april wright therapy

Gratitude a Fulfilling Year-Round Process

Family quarrels, busy friends, negative media focus, and critical co-workers and supervisors can leave you feeling depressed, anxious, and alone. The negativity of the world doesn’t have to effect your inner world. Gratitude is your key to unlocking happiness.

Gratitude is being aware of and appreciating good things that happen and taking the time to express thanks. Here are just a few positive outcomes of expressing gratitude:

  • Less burnout
  • Higher job satisfaction
  • Motivates pro-social behavior
  • Corporate social responsibility
  • Affect perception of the workplace
  • Positive bias in remembering life events
  • Promotes effective coping skills

There are many ways to express gratitude. One suggestion is keeping a daily journal in which you list as many things you feel appreciative of in a ten-minute time span. You may desire to focus on dispositional and situational gratitude. Focusing on different aspects of well-being brings is another way to bring more gratitude into your life. Thus if you are more grateful for social aspects of your life but not your work environment, you may benefit by focusing your appreciation on workplace issues.

To ensure consistency consider choosing a convenient, consistent time and location. With repetition, a healthy habit is formed, and you’ll start noticing the benefits. To increase the likelihood that you will follow through on maintaining a gratitude journal consider:

  • Timing
  • Frequency
  • Place
  • Environment

Things to consider:

Time span

Daily journaling is the most effective. Regardless, research shows entries made daily, over a short period (two weeks) or longer; weekly over a longer period (ten weeks) had a positive impact.

Focus

Professional. Intimacy. Family. Social. Personal. Recreation. Spiritual. Career. You may choose to pay attention to a different aspect of your life each day of the week or to center on only one facet over a particular time span. It is your choice.

Method

Use pencil and paper, audio recording, word processing, or a smartphone or tablet computer application. Does one approach differ in effectiveness versus another? Choose the one that enables you to maintain consistency.

Letter writing

Write a letter expressing your gratitude to a particular person, supervisor, colleague, friend, or loved one could impact the recipients’ attitudes and behavior in the workplace, home environment, or social settings. It can also help you cope more efficiently with conflict even if the letter remains sealed.

I would like to express my gratitude to all of you who have supported me and been a friend and confidant.  Your caring nature and support have been invaluable in my development.  Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I know that the holidays can be a tough time for many, so I offer my support.
If there is someone you know who may need help, please have them reach out to me at (424) 258-5416.

Let Love Shine

Let today serve as a reminder of the importance of love. Don’t just think of it as a commodity you fight for and conquer with conniving tricks and strategic dating tactics. Realize that love is evident in how you see the world; it’s a seed in you. The more you see love in the people around you, even in the hLet Love Shine April Wright therapyeart of a stranger, the more you’ll be blessed with its radiant light.

April Wright Therapy Finding Forgiveness

How to Find Forgiveness

Silhouette of woman with hands raised into the sunset

“The act of forgiveness is the act of returning to present time.”  ~ Caroline Myss

Like almost everything else, forgiveness begins at home. Self-forgiveness is a form of self-compassion, and without it, we flog ourselves for every little wrongdoing. In addition, we come to treat others the way we treat ourselves. Listen to your judgments of others, and remind yourself that you’re actually projecting your judgments of yourself onto them, probably unconsciously operating the way you were programmed in your family of origin. Everyone makes mistakes all day long. Own yours! Apologize when you can, then start over with a greater understanding of what you did wrong. When you begin to forgive yourself for your imperfections, you begin to change positively from the inside out. And when that happens, forgiveness naturally flows outward to others.

But forgiveness for ourselves–or from another–is not a natural process. It’s not something either “should” do; it happens when we are ready. Like in any dynamic development, glimmers of forgiveness may emerge unexpectedly, then, just as suddenly, recede. Stay open but keep moving forward. If you’ve hurt another, move forward with forgiveness.  If it’s not received well, don’t compound it with impatience. Let the other come towards you when she or he is ready. Meanwhile, give yourself permission to forgive your past mistakes. Remember, forgiveness doesn’t happen all at once–it comes in stages and may never feel complete.

Forgive only when your heart tells you it’s the right time. Forgiving prematurely can hurt you further because forgiving too soon denies the truth. You are on your own timetable. Take your time and stay present. Just remember that waiting too long, holding onto anger, can be toxic to your body, mind, and spirituality.  Holding tightly creates resentment that keeps you sick and stuck. Suffering doesn’t make you a better person. In fact, it demonstrates self destructive behavior.  Treat yourself with kindness and it will prelude to others. Obsessing over the past won’t heal your heartbreak, but forgiveness of yourself and others can restore you both.

Taken from Mirror of Intimacy:  Daily Reflections on Emotional and Erotic Intelligence

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